I am a stalker. There I have admitted it. I am not proud of it but I felt as my readers you should know that I have gone ape shit crazy when it comes to knowing where my packages are at any given moment.
It began innocently enough. The past few holiday seasons I did a huge portion of my shopping online. Whenever a certain package would ship Amazon would send me an email with a tracking number to track my packages. At first I thought “Wow this is really cool” and I would keep track of the packages so I would know when they were being delivered.
Then came the release of the iPhone 5. Of course Michael just had to have it and the best way was to pre-order and have it shipped to be delivered on the release day. That is when I went from being a concerned customer to an all out UPS stalker. I would wake up in the middle of the night and hit the tracking number on my phone and find out where the phone was. I could tell you where the package was at any given moment. I knew when it was loaded on the truck, taken to the airport and which sorting station it was in. I don’t have that many details as to where Michael is at any given moment.
Since then whenever I purchase something online (like the super cute Nine West black boots that arrived today) I become obsessed with tracking it. If I had my way I would be able to call the UPS facility or the truck itself and talk to the driver. I am sure he would just love “stalker lady” asking him exactly how long he was going to be at lunch or if he could possibly stop by my house early so I could wear my boots that night.
I have lost all control over my ability to wait patiently until the door bell rings and I hear the package thump on the porch. I need to keep track of all my goodies. Where are they? Are they being thrown around? Did they get delivered to the wrong house? These are the questions that haunt me.
If only I could track Michael as easily as I can my packagesI could take my stalker level to DEFCON 5.