three generations and a dog. Not just any car trip but a two -day trip in 103 degree temperatures!! There has to be some type of prize out there for me somewhere. Highlights of the trip:

1: My daughter wants to drive but has no desire to learn how to pump gas.

2: My son likes to watch movies with the wireless headphones on but insists on relaying every funny phrase or action sequence to you in a VERY loud voice.

3: A large diet coke from McDonalds (not matter how happy it makes you) translates in to a bathroom stop about every 150 miles. If I was traveling with my bff Tara that would be much shorter.

4: It is apparently against the law for everyone to pee or be hungry at the same time. Therefore we were averaging only 75 miles at a time.

5: Everyone wanted to go and pick the dog up early from grandma Jackie’s but NO one wants to let him out at 6:30 a.m..

6: If a fly starts attacking my mother at a McDonalds she looks alot like a person with Teret’s syndrome. This also will make Ashley choke on chicken selects. For those of you that don’t know those are the five dollar version of the chicken nugget. At that price I assured her that if the hemilich manever was necessary we would be retrieving that piece of chicken from the other side of the room for “re-consumption”.

7. Ashley is now 5’7″ tall which means I got to ride all 750 miles with her bright red painted toe nails sticking up on either side of me. The next time I travel in this manner I will be soliciting a sponsor say maybe the company that makes Xanax. I will put a big sign on the van that says THIS TRIP MADE POSSIBLE BY XANAX and gobble down all the free samples they will give me. I think that is a fabulous plan. Don’t you?